I weep for the future

I have learned my lesson:

Never talk about the future or grad school possibilities after a long day of classes you loathe.

Especially if you're talking to someone you now rarely see or get to talk to.

As per usual, we pretty much ended up talking about our futures (or rather, my future, because it's selfish old me and I can only have conversations about myself, so beware. I'm self-involved) and it just made me really upset. I understand that these are issues that I have to address, and I KNOW that everyone feels hopeless when it comes to decisions about grad school or jobs. But just because everyone is having their eyes stabbed out with a spork doesn't make the fact that you're eyes are getting stabbed out with a spork any less painful.

So I whined and I made excuses and probably drove Bridget absolutely round the bend with my whining and excuses. It was so bad that when I got off the phone I was feeling hopeless about law/grad school AND there was self-loathing going on for taking over that damn conversation with my stupid insecurities, AS I ALWAYS SEEM TO DO.

*sigh*

I'm not going into the conversation here. I lived it once. I'm not going into it again.

But! There is light in this post

I went upstairs, drank a ton of water to push down that damn knot in my throat and talked with Emily for a bit. One thing led to another and now I have an appointment with a career planner person thingy who apparently is God when it comes to helping Arts and Letters kids find a job to shoot for. Here's to hoping that she blesses me with abundant job wisdom and opportunities. Amen

And then I made myself some monkey bread with melted frosting on it.

And then we watched A Very Potter Musical

And then I laughed until I couldn't laugh anymore

And then I went to bed.

Yay

take it easy. don't die. don't get raped